Going CRAZY!

Okay, this is my major thought for today: There's a guy. Go figure. For the purpose of this exercise (I love how I'm attempting to sound official) we'll call him Armando. I've liked Armando for a VERY long time. Like, since last year. Well, I found out this week that my ex-boyfriend (for the purpose of this exercise, we'll call him Eduardo), has a new girlfriend. I'm very happy for Eduardo, but I can't help but be a little bit jealous. I mean, if he can get someone, why can't I??? Anyway, that has little to do with my foul mood today. My foul mood today is because I feel pretty much completely undesirable. Armando, who, as I've said I have a huge crush on, has a thing with another girl. For awhile, we were talking, nothing that even said he was interested in me, but we were talking, and I thought that was improvement. He acted like he wanted to be my friend. The only problem was that I want to be MORE than his friend. Today, I saw him walking down the hall with this other girl that he has a thing with, and he smiled at me. But he was walking down the hall with her. So he's obviously not the least bit interested in me. I'm just sad. I wish I had someone.

I gotta work. I'll post more later.
-Kylee

Happy Valentines Day

Well, I didn't have a valentine today, but I'll say it anyway. Happy Valentine's day everyone! I hope those of you out there who do have a someone special have had a wonderful day. Today's message at church was awesome. It was about how Jesus made the ultimate sacrifice to love us, so we need to love with the kind of love he showed. I really want to do that. I don't want to be self centered and always focused on the way people treat me. I want to focus on the way I treat people. I really, truly, whole-heartedly want to love like Jesus loved. I'm attempting to read my Bible. I'm having problems with comprehending what I'm reading, but I'm trying. I'm working at it and asking God for help. I figure He can help me, even when no one else can. Nothing else is really going on. I'm going to make a big valentines heart for my wall, saying "Love people as Christ first loved Me!!". Just a reminder that I'm no different than anyone else, and that I need to love like Jesus did. It's kind of humbling, really.

Well, that's my thought for the day. Not much, but it's just what's on my mind. I need to go out in the world this week and commit to it with my words and actions.

Have a good week everyone! I'll post again soon!
~Kylee

A Constant Battle

I've been battling my weight for as long as I can remember. Probably since I was 5, maybe even before. Last week, I weighed myself, and I've reached a whopping 320 pounds. I'm not saying this because I'm proud of it. I'm saying this because I need some accountability. I've ordered a book that I've alread read called "Skinny Chicks Don't Eat Salads". It's basically a program where you eat a small, balanced meal every 4 hours to keep your energy levels and metabolism up. This helps reduce sugar cravings and binging or overeating. My mother and I are starting this program as soon as the books come in. I really want to do it this time. I know I've said this before, but I mean it. Before I think I was just holding out until I am old enough to have a weight loss procedure done. Well, I may still have a weightloss procedure done, but until I'm old enough for it, I HAVE to do something. If I don't, I'm going to be 500 pounds by the time I reach the age where I can have surgery!! I'm not going to let that happen. I'm not going to sit back and watch it happen, like I have been. I need to start taking responsibility for some of my actions, starting with my eating. I'm posting this because my dashboard has told me that I have one follower, and like I said, I NEED THE ACCOUNTABILITY! Whoever that follower is, I thank you for taking the time to read my blog. Please continue! And feel free to mention my weightloss endeavor frequently if you feel like. Leave comments attached to the posts or something.

Wish me luck!!
Kylee